Who Are You With?

I used to be with Past. It was great when we first met. Past allowed me to behave anyway I wanted to and allowed me to blame whoever I wanted to for all my problems. There were so many times Past would remind of all the people who hurt me and all the events in my life that were painful. Past and I would do this all night long all day long-all the time. Past told me it was okay to be angry at the world – after all look what they did to you.

However after many years of being with Past I found myself not only emotionally and physically exhausted but becoming quite sick. Past insisted I stay there and endorsed drug and alcohol use, except that was killing me also. I had had enough of Past and walked into a new relationship with Future. Oh boy! This was new a fresh and Future had so many promises for me. Future told me how my life was going to be (sometime in the future).

Each day I would wake up and there would be future with all sorts of promises –about what was in store for me -fame and fortune and more. However I started to feel that everything and everyone was in the way of me getting what Future promised me and Future hadn’t delivered yet!

Every day became a nuisance and my frustration grew. Every day was just a means to an end and I was becoming angrier and depressed and exhausted. Then something happened. Future’s promises of fame and fortune tuned into future of doom and gloom, death and misery, failure and sickness. One day I couldn’t take living with Future any longer and I walked away. I was left with no one. There I was with no Past and no Future and out of nowhere Present showed up in my life.

Present was so different then Past and Future. I quickly found that all my anger and my fears all my regrets all my delusion weren’t here with Present. I started to experience fist relief and then freedom with present I started to have gratitude with Present and then I realized that only with Present did I experience God. Past lied to me and so did Future, but now present. Present loves every moment and is alive to every moment is grateful and Present is so protective of me from past and future. I love being with Present. I am free only with Present. I love Present.

Who Are You With?

Peter Marinelli
“Chop wood, Carry water”